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You’ve
heard it said many times, “Follow your bliss. Pursue your passion.
Do what you love doing”. Not only has it been said for thousands
of years, and it’s also backed by modern career interest surveys
and assessments. It doesn’t take a scientist to figure out that
most people do well what they love doing, and love doing what they do
well.
One
of the most prolific authors on this subject is Marcus Buckingham. He
has written a number of outstanding books including Now, Discover Your
Strengths and Go Put Your Strengths to Work in which he provides powerful
proof on the linkage between excellence and doing what you do well everyday.
Buckingham’s years of research show that people “playing
to their strengths significantly outperform those who don't in almost
every business metric”.
When I decided to transition from the corporate world, I starting by
writing down what I loved, what moved me, what excited me and what fulfilled
me during my years as a leader. In those pages I discovered a blueprint
from which I could design my coaching and consulting practice. The key
elements in that blueprint became the foundation for my coaching and
consulting business.
What
are those key elements? They are a translation of the competencies I
used to perform the things I love doing. Using psychometric tools and
other leadership assessments, I identified the skills, experience, motives,
interests, values, strengths, as well as my own particular style in
order to understand how I could add the most value to my clients. It’s
exactly the same process I use to help CEOs assess and select senior
leaders, except that I was assessing myself for a business I would love
doing for years to come.
I knew if I focused on what I loved doing, both my clients and I would
be well served. Eight years later I am still energized and immensely
fulfilled by my work. I even devoted a chapter in my book, The Secret
of Transitions, to the power that is created when purpose and passion
are combined to launch a life or career transition.
So why is pursuing one’s passion often a recipe for a career or
small business dead-end? It’s because we often mistake “being
comfortable” as an important indicator of something we love doing.
Here’s an easy exercise to test the assertion I just made. Answer
this question as fast as you can: What do you like doing? Go ahead and
write down the answers. Now compare the answers with the answers to
these questions: What have been your peak moments? If you’re stuck,
think about your best day; your most rewarding day; or your most fulfilling
day. What were you doing and why was it so enjoyable?
I’ve interviewed hundreds of people, and I’ve never had
anyone tell me that their best day ever was comfortable. When you get
home and your partner asks “Did you have a good day?” you
might say yes because there were no hassles or emergencies. But that
easy day probably doesn’t represent your best day ever.
In fact, many say their best day ever was when they were the most challenged,
and they were still able to succeed by using their true strengths and
talents. Others when asked about their best day identify a significant
contribution to they made to another person, their team, a customer
or their organization. Not only is overcoming a challenge and making
a difference personally rewarding, but that is also when our needs for
approval, recognition, a sense of achievement and other rewards are
fulfilled. That’s what motivation is all about.
But even more important is that these tough situations actually improve
and add to our strengths. It’s just like muscle building. Muscle
growth comes through an appropriate mix of learning the correct techniques,
practice, and increased stress followed by a recovery period. It holds
true for personal and professional growth as well.
Yes, I agree that loving your work and using your strengths every day
is great. But without on-going growth, those strengths rapidly atrophy,
and even become irrelevant. In many fields today, the amount of new
information and knowledge is doubling every couple of years. A person
can become obsolete in less than five years without on-going growth.
And the best kind of professional development is not always comfortable.
The best personal development practices include a combination of training,
coaching and new and challenging experiences in which a person is at
risk and the stakes are high.
Combine
challenging experiences with direct, honest and frequent feedback, and
you’ve got a proven formula for growth.
Frankly, failure can be a powerful teacher. I’ve not only heard
it but I’ve experienced it. But it’s usually better earlier
in your career than later. When it comes too late, it can have a devastating
effect of all of the stakeholders, not just the executive.
You’ve probably heard of the phenomenon known as “The empty
suit,” referring to an executive who no longer has any real substance
or competence. After years of getting only wildly positive feedback,
the executive believes he is truly exceptional and supremely deserving.
There is no longer any real motivation to learn or grow. Excessively
arrogant and convinced of his infallibility, he sticks rigidly to his
old strategies and ways of doing business. He rejects new ideas automatically.
And the empty suit soon starts to fail, sometimes taking the entire
company down with him. We’ve seen that hubris all too often in
recent corporate scandals.
This just doesn’t apply to executives who happen to wear suites.
I don’t care what you wear, it can happen to anyone. Anything
that is not growing will waste away in all respects – physically,
emotionally, mentally and spiritually. There will be little left but
an empty shell.
One of the reasons so many of us resist growth is the result of a paradoxical
career trap. Even if people love their jobs, it can still be stressful
and require long hours. Once they get home, family and community duties
can be equally demanding. There is little capacity or energy left for
growth, especially if the need for balance and recovery has been ignored.
So they’re stuck. No growth, no new opportunities. They encounter
a career dead end of their own making.
Given how many people are seeking a way out of their stressful situations,
I wonder how many small businesses are mistakenly purchased as a symbolic
representation of one’s passion. Instead of a dream come true,
that Bed & Breakfast in New Hampshire becomes a nightmare. That’s
because it wasn’t a bold pursuit of purpose and passion. It was
an escape.
Retreats and safe harbors are wonderful for reclaiming and rebuilding
one’s resources. But they can be lousy places to live. If your
“dream” creates a sense of an idyllic and comfortable future,
you could be heading down the wrong path. Instead of feeling comfortable,
perhaps it is fear that signals your true path. Personally, I’ve
found that lurking behind my greatest aspirations, there is fear. The
bigger my dream, the greater my resistance.
Almost any time we contemplate a new and untested future, we are likely
to experience a confusing mix of exhilaration and fear. It’s probably
a natural result of our early childhood conditioning. But the most common
regrets expressed at the end of life are centered on not risking enough
to discover one’s true gifts and use them to make a difference
– to know that their life mattered. Instead, they played it safe
and comfortably.
Experiencing a regret at the end of your career and especially at the
end of your life is way too late. Start now. Being tested, stretched
and going beyond the edge of your comfort zone is nature’s prescription
for vitality, confidence, and strength. Welcome that fear you feel at
the beginning of a transition. It is a gift you must unwrap.
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